Food Riot

Play with your food.
Recent Tweets @foodriot
“And I’m not talking about drinking crap beer ironically, either. It’s possible to genuinely enjoy both crap and craft beer. Popping open a Michelob or a Heineken or a Corona shouldn’t diminish your beer cred (although professional brewmasters will probably want to play it safe and use the bodega bag method). Most of the time, I prefer something hearty from a local microbrewery. But I have no problem saying that most beer snobs need to be knocked down from their dry-hopped, barrel-aged pedestals.”
-In Defense of Crap Beer

And I’m not talking about drinking crap beer ironically, either. It’s possible to genuinely enjoy both crap and craft beer. Popping open a Michelob or a Heineken or a Corona shouldn’t diminish your beer cred (although professional brewmasters will probably want to play it safe and use the bodega bag method). Most of the time, I prefer something hearty from a local microbrewery. But I have no problem saying that most beer snobs need to be knocked down from their dry-hopped, barrel-aged pedestals.”

-In Defense of Crap Beer

Our daily morning roundup of food-related fare from around the web.

It all sounds thinning and healthy—the sort of meal plan a lot of us make unlikely resolutions about after the second glass of champagne on New Year’s Eve. The problem, though, is that the modern paleo diet is not what Paleolithic people—the real-life originals of Fred and Wilma—actually ate.

Be quiet, with your facts and whatnot.

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Maryland health officials are investigating possible cases of food poisoning at what may be the worst-ever venue — a gathering of government and industry leaders attending a national Food Safety Summit.

*snicker*

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Long before spring sprung this year, my brilliant local greengrocer had in some attractive mini crates of king-sized strawberries. Pah, I thought. They’ll be all fur coat and no knickers. But then someone brought some round as a gift and they were delicious.

One person’s anecdote does not a widely accepted truth about food (that it is better in season) bust.

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The pistachios shells could be burned for biogas that is then used for heat, providing up to 60 percent of the city’s heating needs. According to French environmental engineering company Burgeap who first came up with the pistachio idea, the region’s Antep pistachios were its most feasible source of energy.

Go ahead, Turkey!

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I was once publicly flogged in Singapore for refusing to fasten the top three buttons of my shirt. I’d do it again.

Hunting humans for sport? I’ve tried it. Sure. But I still won’t eat at Chili’s.

My eyes are sleepy, but my heart’s awake, and it hates you.


This Letter From Anthony Bourdain is everything.

There wasn’t much ceremony to volunteering to make pierogie at Seattle’s Polish Home Association for their upcoming bazaar. Everyone else spoke Polish and was there out of love for their community. My friends and I, none of us Polish by anything other than remote heritage, were there out of a different kind of love: that of dumplings. I’m not saying I can’t be altruistic at times, but I’ll be honest: I volunteered because I wanted to watch these Eastern European dumpling masters and learn their trade secrets. I just had no idea what kind of lessons I was in for.

"Anyway, I a) overwhelmed myself with too many vegetables because Go Big Or Go To The Grocery Store And Not Your Own Garden and b) was too impatient to wait for the chill/last winter rain to break because I got caught up in how it was Technically Spring, so the result is thusly: a week and a half later, nothing sprouted but weeds.

Where David is both my drowned pea seeds and my irrational expectations.”

-Woes Of A First-Time Vegetable Gardener: The Plantening, Part One

In this case the idea of “comfort food” goes both ways. Not only does the food I make bring James comfort amidst a lot of discomfort, but such food brings me comfort in the fact that for a few blissful mouthfuls, a little bit of peace and normalcy is perhaps restored to our little family. Food may not be able to cure Cancer (yet), but it most certainly heals.
The Happiest I’ve Ever Been To Make Food I Cannot Eat- one vegetarian, gluten-free Rioter on cooking for her family when serious illness comes.

Our daily morning roundup of food-related fare from around the web.

“We are aware of the meat issue with greenhouse gases,” Joanna Yarrow, head of sustainability for Ikea in the UK, said. “We are looking at all our food products from a sustainability perspective but specifically meatballs. They are very popular and they are also our most carbon-intensive food item on our menu.”

Coming to an Ikea near you: vegetarian meatballs.

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We’ll just add that we never imagined this reaction. Similar terms are common in all sorts of consumer contracts, and arbitration clauses don’t cause anyone to waive a valid legal claim. They only specify a cost-effective means of resolving such matters. At no time was anyone ever precluded from suing us by purchasing one of our products at a store or liking one of our Facebook pages. That was either a mischaracterization – or just very misunderstood.

A good rule of thumb when apologizing is: don’t place the blame for the dispute on the customers.

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Chipotle takes burrito-velocity very seriously. The chain puts every part of its assembly line under a microscope to make sure it functions as efficiently as possible. As far as the company is concerned, faster service is the same thing as better service. 

When I’m at a fast-casual place, I agree with that definition of better service.

My face’s fire engine pantone betrayed my lame secret to the table. “You are insane,” they decided. And the first time, I realized that I was. I didn’t need the glasses, utensils, condiments and shakers. Most of the time I didn’t particularly want them. But I couldn’t stop grabbing them, justifying my crimes with the kind of Fox News twisted logic that I claimed, as a well-adjusted adult, to eschew.